I need to journal at least twice a day x. And where I do that and how long it is depends on what I feel like. It’s also to clear my mind for reading other people’s stuff.
I realized that when I read and learn, I should treat it as some other, some other life. The words on paper have a life, for they were someone else’s blood. Also, it’s bad to like anthropomorphize everything new immediately to You. It’s fundamentally something alien to me.
I realized, since a while ago, that I am a sovereign. I feel like I am cultivating what that means everyday. It happens in the silence, in the frictions of time, like when I’m not working, when I get out of bed. It could be called my occupation, overall.
I realized this morning, when I woke up and my mind is so clear, that I should just clear off my mind, get rid of useless things, and just start. It’s called make things easy. (The metaphysical burdens, the fog which hang upon it, the whatever, doesn’t matter; it’s just the thing.)
Also, I should abide by my own will. It means that if I decide something, even if it’s erroneous, even if I’m proven false at the end, as long as I thought about this and this is what I decide, I ought to follow it; there can be no inconsistency in these matters in life. The same with other things I do: I ought to finish them from beginning to end. It could be called being at one (with myself). I think there is a sense of accountability and responsibility in life.
These are new phrases grown out of my life, like new tree branches or flowers that blossoms, from the previous branches.
I have made myself very comfortable, with my organizational work and new clothing and stuff; It felt necessary to me. I think it says something about myself. And, after that, what I am going into is that there are responsibilities and obligations as a sovereign, not just privilege and enjoyment. So that’s the part where I treat myself really responsibly.
Going to work. (I am home officed and it feels wonderful.)
And a little bit on my resting habit: I think I drank something which contains caffine by mistake at night. I ate melatonin and went to sleep around 2am. I got up 915, waking up naturally a minute before the alarm clock. So my body feels really intelligent, and I think it’s best to listen to it. Let it wake up naturally. And I’m going to sleep at 12 because I don’t actually like going to sleep at 1 or 2; makes me feel dizzy. I had really good energy the previous two days, and I think I went to sleep around 11 or 12, without eating melatonin.
ErisMing 